Canyon Lake

This weekend Emily and I went up north to the Brainerd area, to a friend's cabin on the Whitefish chain of lakes, in northern Minnesota.




The lay of the land is so very glaicial. But this is hard to imagine when it's in the mid-90s two hours north of Minneapolis. Sadly I forgot my fishing license and our friends couldn't find theirs. But we still had fun tooling around in the boat and going swimming. It was weird though, because it really felt like we were on Canyon Lake in south Texas. I had to keep reminding myself we were up north.

Our friends have a three year-old daughter who recently cut her own hair. The result was a mullet. So whenever the boat got up to a decent speed, I'd encourage her to shout "ROCK AND ROLL!!" She was more than happy to oblige which really complimented her haircut.

Grinnell College Cross Country RULES!!!

One more link update.

I can give no shouts out to Carleton College, as they were one of our Central Region rivals, and they consistently out-recruited us during the four years I was at Grinnell.

One of the jackasses that picked Carleton over Grinnell was Gaio Lakin, despite the fact that we had plans to name a set of relays after him, due to the kickass nature of his name. A teammate of mine (we'll call him the Klassmaster) came up the Gaio Lakin Relays, a party to be held out at the track, then night after our home track meet. We even had the innagural Gaio Lakin relays my freshman (or was it sophomore?) year, and it was a smashing success. But then the jackass decided to go to Carelton and we changed the name of the event to the Horse's Asshole Relays (I made that last part up).

I've run into Gaio a few times since living in the Twin Cities (literally, while running and at a few parties) and then he came over to my house last summer, drank all my beer, ran home, and I haven't seen him since. So the dude stands up our team after we name a party after him and ten years later shows up to drink all my beer and then disappears like Kaiser Soze from The Usual Suspects. So it speaks to the kickassedness of this Gaio charachter that I've added a link to his site, after he broke my heart twice.

You may want to wait awhile before visiting his site. He says he needs to update it. I agree. But I remember he had some photo on his site that was getting tons of hits. Something about how he took a picture of his bent leg and looked like a hairy butt, so he named the picture "hairy butt" and a whole bunch of people who wanted pictures of real hairy butts ended up looking at a picture of Gaio's bent leg.

So all you hairy butt fans out there, don't be disappointed by Gaio's site.

And I am hereby requesting Gaio start up the hendecathalon again. Unless he's afraid Grinnell Cross Country will fuck his shit up!!!!

By the way, good luck with the triathalon Gaio. xoxoxo

Alamo Heights Football RULES!!!

Shouts out to my alma mater. I still need to update the links at the side of my blog. But I have added the link to Gabriel Mann's band 's website. A quick Google search will show you that there are two Gabriel Manns. Apparently one of them was in Bourne Supremacy. But the other Gabriel Mann is the one I am concerned about.

Check out his website. Listen to his songs. The dude's got golden pipes. Buy a few CDs. I also went to high school and junior high with him. Off the top of my head I can remember going to some poorly attended Spurs games with him, back in their mid-80s suckiness. Jon Sunvold. Cadillac Anderson. Walter "The Truth" Barry. Ed Nealy. Albert King. Damn I loved the Spurs even at the depths of the shittiness.

And I remember walking next to Gabriel at lunchtime when two guys had the following conversation in front of us (both were poorly dressed for the cold front that had moved in somtime between 8 a.m. and noon).

Guy 1: "Dude this is bullshit! Someone get me a heater!"

Guy 2: "I know right!?!"

I'm not sure how to punctuate the phrase "I know right," but it was damn ubiquitous back in the day. And I don't know why that specific conversation is burned in my mind, but it is a good one. But I doubt Gabriel turned it into a song.

All-Star Game Thoughts

I watched most of baseball's All-Star Game last night while doing some wild and crazy shit like folding and ironing clothes. And I came away with the following thoughts:

1. How in the hell do the Florida Marlins have four All-Stars on their roster and are barely above .500? Who's their manager, John Lucas? Bob Hill? Only die-hard Spurs fans will get those references.

2. The only All-Star game I'll watch, let alone look to see who won, is baseball. I really don't know why I still watch it, but I still enjoy it.

3. The frustration I get with Bud Selig never dulls with time. I still cannot get over how incredibly stupid it is that the World Series home field advantage is decided by the All-Star Game.

4. Wasn't Christian Guzman once an All-Star?

5. The Twins acquisition of Brett Boone is meaningless if Brad Radke and Johan Santana aren't dominant the second half of the season. I love the Twins. But the way the AL West teams are coming on, and with the awakening of the BoSox and Yanks, I don't see the Twins making the playoffs this year. No one wants me to be wrong about this more than I do.

How Can You Heartbreak A Stranger?

Those of you who know me well, know how much I love to find random photos, ATM receipts, notes, grocery lists... So you'll be happy to know my cell phone struck gold for me over the weekend.

If there is a moral to the story you're about to read, it's don't drink and text message. Especially when the message you plan to send is pathetic, groveling, and bares your soul as a stained, hole infested pair of tighty-whities.

At 3 a.m. on Friday night (Saturday morning actually), I got a message on my cell phone. It was a text message. When I read it at 3 a.m. this was all I read:

The pain you cause me is really unfair and unnecessary.

Then when I looked at it again the next day, I found a bonus. There was more! I just hadn't scrolled down.

The pain you cause me is really unfair and unnecessary. Why do I tolerate you? I know... I know... Because I love you. But this is ridiculous. Good night.

An FBI profiler I ain't, but I judge the messenger to be a 23 year old white male who assumed his recipient was a 22 year old white female. Little did he know his message was actually sent to a 33 year-old white male. If I was a bolder person I would have called the phantom text messenger back, but I'm not going to do that. So I guess he/she will have to wonder why his/her boy/girlfriend never replied to his/her pathetic 3 a.m. text message.

My cell phone: a modern day dead letter office.

Throw the Bums Out

I figure if I get this out on a blog, Emily won't be have to hear my rants about the freaking state shutdown caused by the Minnesota legislature. Two quick points and then it will be off my chest.

1. I actually voted for the Green Party candidate, Ken Pentel, in the 2002 gubenatorial election. In the months that followed I wished I had supported Tim Penny more and voted for him. I could not ever imagine voting for Roger Moe, the Democrats' nominee. He seemed like an old deal maker and power broker more than anything else. He was uninspiring to say the least. But I wish I knew then what I know now.

I think we really could use Roger Moe either as governor or to take the place of that nitwit Dean Johnson. Moe would have brokered a deal long ago. I dislike Dean Johnson for the same reason I distrust Joe Lieberman. Both those guys were bought and sold by special interest years ago, but they are too self-righteous to admit it. At least with Moe, you knew what he was up to. He was going to put the heat on his fellow DFLers to vote a certain way by brokering deals with them or by flexing his muscles. We could use that now.

2. I am sick of all the blaming. Sure the GOP, DFL, and governor should all be pointing the fingers at themselves instead of at each other. But I also think we should stop blaming them and start blaming ourselves. Why the hell is it that the legislature was able to broker a last-minute bill to keep the state parks open during the shut down, but couldn't compromise on weightier issues? One reasons might be because the backlash of closing the parks the day before the July 4th weekend would have been 30 times what they are suffering right now.

"Sure it sucks that some state employees don't have jobs right now and that business of poor folks losing MinnCare stinks, but there will be hell to pay if you guys ruin my July 4th plans." I'll be honest, this is about how I feel. The rest areas being closed is the only thing that I can see affecting me by the shut down. And that's my point. Jackass voters like me don't raise hell unless the government's screw ups happen in my back yard. And I know I'm not the only one who thinks this way.

And this why we only have ourselves to blame. I have told Emily I am voting all Green and Independent party in the 2006 elections, at the state level. We'll see if my memory of this shutdown can last that long.

There Goes Our Neighborhood

Everyday I find a new reason to feel so very fortunate to live in the neighborhood we do. The latest business to crop up is Sea Salt, which is right by Minnehaha Falls in the concession and picnic shelter. They have fresh sea food for absurdly cheap prices. Click here to see for yourself.

Then go check it out.

Twin Cities Rocks

The Taste of Minnesota seems a little over-the-hill, but Emily and I went to see the Olympic Hopefuls followed by Bob Mould on Sunday night.

Damn, the Olympic Hopefuls are so very good. Very solid power pop rock. Anyone who gets a chance needs to check them out. But apparently that applies only to those of us who live in the Twin Cities, according to their tour calendar.

Bob Mould was a little disappointing. His show was billed as a solo acoustic act. But he left his acoustic guitar and brought an electric guitar instead. I have never been to a solo electric guitar show, but it was hard to hear any melody. We left after about five songs. I'll give Bob Mould credit, he is always experimenting and trying new things, and this was one more example.